Filipino Balikbayan Gift Giving and Gift Receiving Customs

February 3rd, 2010

Filipinos are known for their hospitality and thoughtfulness. One of the popular aspects of the Philippine culture is the gift giving and gift receiving customs. Balikbayans or Filipinos from abroad usually bring gifts for relatives, friends, and peers. If you are not familiar with these customs, read on to know how you should ask or decline a Filipino balikbayan gift.

Polite ways to ask for balikbayan gifts

When asking for a balikbayan gift, you can ask someone jokingly. When you do this, you won’t sound imposing, but at the same time you give your friend an idea on what is it that you really want. Another option is to ask your friend for the gift that you want. Just make sure that you should exude all the charms you can muster when you ask for a gift. It is also important to ask if it is alright if you ask for a gift. Make sure that you use the words please, can you, and thank you. If your friend says no, you can say it’s alright and then flash him or her a bright smile to let him or her know that it’s really alright.

Polite ways to decline

How about declining a gift from a Filipino balikbayan? Asking for a gift seems a lot easier than declining one. In the latter, you risk offending the giver of the gift. To decline a gift, you have to be very tactical. You have to tell your friend the reason why you can’t accept the gift. You have to make him or her understand the reason. You also have to say the reason gently and charmingly in order to avoid offending the giver. One thing you should not forget is to say thank you and that you appreciate the offer.

Giving and receiving gifts are integral parts of Filipino customs. If you think that there’s no harm done in accepting a gift, you should accept the gift and thank the one who gave it to you. But if you believe that there’s enough reason not to accept the gift, then say it with great care so you won’t offend the giver. You have to remember that a gift is given with good intentions, so this is why you should really avoid hurting the feelings of the giver.

Related questions:

1. What’s the polite way to tell someone that you prefer money instead of a gift?
2. Is it polite to ask for a specific thing for a gift?
3. Do I have to give something back when I receive a gift?

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Noynoy Aquino’s alleged Autism and Manny Villar’s handicap

January 3rd, 2010

The blogosphere and mainstream Filipino media is currently abuzz with allegations regarding NoyNoy’s alleged boyhood autism.

We disagree with Efren Montano’s conclusion about NoyNoy’s alleged AUTISM:  “SENATOR Benigno “Noynoy” Aquino’s skeletons in the closet will be his waterloo at the day of reckoning in the 2010 elections” …  Instead of “weakening” Aquino this “realization” will only strengthen him.

Strength among financiers

(sarcasm) Monopoly-based NoyNoy supporting clans and other entrenched interests with an alleged vested interest in maintaining the economic status quo (but not the political status quo) should REJOICE at this news.  What luck–a semi-autistic president that is easy to influence and manipulate?  Oh boy, Machiavelli should be rubbing his hands with glee right now–sadly, he’s in Hell.

Sarcasm aside, there is a kernel of truth there.  Whoever the real corporate/vested interest backers of NoyNoy are, the last thing spurned backers or backers who want to maintain their influence wants is a WILY SURVIVOR like GMA.  They want someone moldable.  They want someone they can easily influence.  Allegations of autism fit this bill.

Strength among voters

If you want Pinoy sympathy, assume the role of the victim.  For good or bad, many Pinoys love to see themselves, either outright or through implication, as victims.  Whether victims of the rich  (their poverty resulting from some zero-sum game maneuver by the better off part of the economy), victims of nature (although living in flood plains or in unstable landslide prone areas could arguably have been avoided with better planning) or just by bad luck in general.  Hence, they would normally gravitate towards someone that they can empathize with.  Compare that to the message Villar’s subtext poses–he was once poor but became very rich.  Obvious message:  anyone can rise above.  This isn’t exactly welcome news to a society that lionizes victimhood and where excuses for failure are very common.  Subtext message:  Villar rose from grinding poverty why didn’t the people around him do the same.  This is the deal killer for many of the electorate.  It’s bad enough that they can’t empathize with Villar’s rise from poverty it is rubbing salt in their (mental) wounds to deduce that Villar’s rise is from his own personal efforts.  The latter is painful to realize because it shines an unflattering light on the efforts of the masses to lift themselves up from poverty.

Intrigues and public persona aside, Villar and Aquino signify two ideas that figure prominently in the Filipino political imagination–the Self-Made Man and the Fortunate Son.  It is easier to identify with the fortunate son, specially if he has a (it is claimed) a handicap since the source of his fortune is not of his own choosing or making.  His handicap is a mere bonus since a people with a VICTIMHOOD MENTALITY will find it easier to identify with him because he was BORN RICH.  There’s no more distasteful and unflattering realization that everyone born poor can, with faith, effort, planning, and risktaking, make it … and in Villar’s case, make it BIG.   Villar, the Self-Made Man rising in a country that perceives itself as a country of Fate-Made Men has a tougher climb.

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Maguindanao and the castration of Philippine Media power

November 26th, 2009

During the 1968 anti-Vietnam War protests at the Democratic National Convention in Chicago, the protesters, faced with guns pointed at them and police goons ready to beat them to a pulp (many were, in fact, beaten) would point to the cameras and yell “THE WHOLE WORLD IS WATCHING!  THE WHOLE WORLD IS WATCHING!”  Implicit in the whole drama over these days of rage against the government was that the MEDIA, the so-called Fourth Estate, would protect those who exercised their rights by merely doing their job–reporting and broadcasting.

When I think about the many consequences and implications of Maguindanao, I think of those video clips from the 1960s and realize that the MEDIA has been effectively CASTRATED here in the Philippines.  One of the candidates’ spouses, who was to hand in his COC for him, was quoted as saying that since they cannot get police protection for the COC filing she was hoping that the presence of media would deter enemies.  These proved to be fatal notions as the twelve mediamen in the convoy were among the over fifty people massacred.  Their bodies dumped where they fell or buried by a back hoe.  This tragedy should not surprise anyone.  It was a barbarity bound to happen because of the lack of a truly centralized powerful government in the Philippines.
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Is the Philippines a “nation state”?

November 26th, 2009

Maguindanao Massacre reveals the lie behind the Philippine “nation-state”

The Maguindanao Massacre forces Filipinos to question the very basic premise of the Philippines as a “nation-state.”  To apply that term to the Philippines, as it currently exists and operates, is to a disservice to the term as it is understood by and applied to other countries.  One has to understand: before the Spanish came, the Philippines was a mishmash of differing localities each under differing dynastic and semi-dynastic local rulers with shifting alliances.  Each alliance bolstered by intermarriage and blood pacts and other family-based loyalties.  It was a very fragmented place.  There was no universally understood political center unlike its neighbor Indonesia or,  to an even starker degree, the kingdoms of Indochina.  Indeed, only the Muslim regions of the archipelago that would later be called the Philippines could lay claim to even some semblance of centralized political organization.  No wonder part of Spanish decision to conquer the Muslim port city of Manila was its political organization (in addition to its natural harbor).

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Filipino GAPI mentality and Efren Penaflorida

November 24th, 2009

Almost like clockwork, the moment Efren Penaflorida was declared CNN’s Hero of the Year, fellow filipinos scrambled to try and topple him from the peak of Filipino media acclaim.  Critics  focused on the fact that the online voting was somehow skewed because of the perceived rampant vote mobilization in the Philippines.  Others attributed his success in the poll to the lack of nominees from countries with larger online populations.  The critics of these critics lash back with the familiar charges of crab mentality and INGGIT.

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Who is the real hero? Efren Penaflorida or Manny Pacquiao

November 23rd, 2009

Efren Penaflorida recently won CNN’s “Hero of the Year” award for his work with street children.  We deeply admire and respect his efforts at bringing education and assistance to street children.  Manny Pacquiao is often derided as not being a real hero because he “fights for money.”   Depending on how you define “hero”, both these men are heroes.

Manny is a hero to many because here is a native Pinoy who didn’t let his humble background get in the way of putting in the work, sacrifice, dedication, and commitment to excellence needed to be a world class champion in his field. He is an inspiration to many Pinoys who are mired in poverty that yes–you CAN rise up and you CAN give yourself a chance by working hard at something and building character. He didn’t let his color, his appearance, his background, anything … get in the way of his drive to achieve.

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The Enduring Popularity of Wowowee

November 21st, 2009

Often maligned by critics as pimping the less fortunate segments of Philippines society and aiding and abetting supposedly negative aspects of Filipino culture, Wowowee’s popularity has long endured years of controversy.  Regardless of whether critics and observers like it or not,  Wowowee has become a significant cultural phenomenon.  Here is one fairly positive and objective (well, we try!) essay  on what what makes Wowowee so popular:

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Manny Villar and Filipino poverty

October 31st, 2009

Manny Villar recently changed the direction of his presidential campaign from “Tumutulong si Manny Villar” and “Akala mo Trapo” to the theme of RICH versus POOR.  This is a very risky move.  While it is calculated to counter the “Good” vs. “Evil” theme of the NoyNoy camp, it is not without risks.

While Villar likes to emphasize his rags to riches story and the fact that since he rose from poverty and had a lola who was a housemaid, he can relate to the “masa” of Filipinos who are in the lower classes (D & E class).  He  may be overreaching by underestimating one simple fact of human nature:  people tend to be more comfortable with “OLD” money than with “NEW” money.  Specially in the Philippines.  Think about it.  People are less threatened by someone born into wealth because they can always rationalize the person’s higher station in life to a cause he and they could not control.  They can attribute his higher caste to the LUCK of birth.  Hence, they can be comfortable with him and vote for him.

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Our Privacy Policy

October 21st, 2009

Privacy Policy for Daily Random Sites Blog

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Is there hope for Filipinos in the Philippines?

September 29th, 2009

One of our correspondents recently came across a post on a Filipino forum.  The thread starter asked:  “Uunlad ka pa ba Sa Pilipinas?”  (Is there hope for you to move up in the Philippines)

Here is one of our contributors’  answer:

Personal progress requires the right attitude

Keep in mind that many “rich” people came to the Philippines penniless when they started. What is the difference between them and others? They had HOPE for the future, a clear plan to move up, they were willing to WORK to move up, and they never gave up.

As we speak there are many people becoming wealthy off BPO and KPO. You don’t even need to start with a lot of capital. You just need hope, a clear plan, the ability to learn from your mistakes, the ability to keep going despite setbacks and passion.

Most people have the internal ingredients for success–not all manage to mix these ingredients to produce results

The traits of hope, future planning, passion, determination, and willingness to experiment/learn from mistakes only surfaces within Pinoy hearts when they decide to migrate out of the Philippines. That is proof positive that we have the raw ingredients in our own hearts to move up. Unfortunately, we don’t always take the steps and effort needed to mix these ingredients to produce results. Oftentimes, we wait for external factors to push us.

Success is happening here in the Philippines. Now.

While it may be easier to make it in other countries due to their better legal and economic infrastructure (thereby resulting in even playing fields and easier economic uplift), the experience of past entrepreneurs and the current wave of BPO entrepreneurs that people can still make it here in the Philippines. At a meeting I attended last year, I met several entrepreneurs that moved to the Philippines within the past few years who’ve established sizable BPO operations. One balikbayan started with less than $1000 in capital. He grew a 1 workstation data entry business in a rented condo room in Ortigas to a 50+ workstation business and it is still growing.
While there’s many challenges, there are also many rewards.

Success isn’t restricted to entrepreneurs

You don’t necessarily have to be an entrepreneur para umunlad. You can be an employee and do well. The key is to become indispensable. Throw out the “pwede na” attitude that brings mediocrity. Stand out from the crowd. Even if you don’t get paid what you deserve–create a record of excellence and take on more responsibilities and increase your skill set. Then move to a place that will pay your worth and take on new skill sets. That’s why certain BPO workers keep moving up in pay and benefits with each move. You don’t need a degree from a TOP 3 school–one person I met in the seminar I mentioned above went to AMA and in the span of 6 years became a vice-president for a VPA company. His is just one story of many.

You are the only person that can bring success to your life

Regardless of whether you seek your fortune in this country or outside, if you have HOPE, a solid PLAN, a method, and passion, uunlad ka pa. Don’t let anyone’s negativity, crab mentality, or personal issues drag you down (misery loves company). Ultimately, YOU are responsible for your own economic progress in life. Not your parents, not the government, not your friends… but YOU.

Believe it, act on it, Believe in God, and God Speed to you and yours!

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